a bird's eye view

Hellllooo blog readers! What do ya know? 2013 is coming to an end. Already? It feels like just yesterday I was telling you guys what my New Year's resolutions were and expressing my excitement for the new year to come. Well, here I am to do it again!

I just love New Year's Eve. Not because of the parties and TV extravaganzas...in fact, I'm spending my night eating hot cheetos and writing this post. I love it because it is a time to reflect on all the good and bad times that made up the past year and to set goals and get excited for the year to come. I have always been a fan of making resolutions, but I've also learned that it's foolish to make an ideal plan for how you want your year to turn out. You never know what life could throw at you, in fact you don't even know if you are promised another day! A resolution shouldn't have to do with what events you want to happen in the coming year but instead the kind of person you want to be and the way you want to react to the things that might happen throughout the year. I've already thought of tons of little resolutions for myself but I wanted something solid, something I could ooze into every little crack and corner of all the different aspects of my life. Earlier today while I was looking out an airplane window, it hit me. I decided that my general, most important resolution that I want to remember every single day of 2014 is to look at life from a bird's eye view.

What exactly does that mean? I haven't quite figured out yet. Honestly I just liked the sound of it! I was leaving California after an incredible week-long trip and I decided instead of reading or sleeping, I would enjoy the view and reflect on my year. I'm glad I did because I love looking at the world from that perspective. It makes life seem more manageable. Then I got to thinkin'...what if we could look at life from a bird's eye view? I mean obviously we can't actually ever do that, it's God's job to see the map of our entire life. And I don't want to literally see what my entire life will look like, I just want to look at things from the view that there is a bigger picture. Whether I have 5 more minutes to live or 80 more years to live, my life is not just some random series of events that make me feel all different kinds of emotions. Each thing that happens has the potential to further my relationship with God and essentially the potential to further His Kingdom. But only if I let it. A friend told me the other day that it's crazy how God is dependent on us and that all we have to do is run to Him, let Him know that He can have control over a situation and He will do wonders with it. It doesn't mean that He will make it all better and make life easy again, but He will weave the situation into His master plan for your life. He'll teach you from it, help you grow stronger and wiser, reveal to you something new about Himself, or simply just comfort you. So back to the bird's eye thing. Instead of looking at failures as, well, failures and instead of living in a cloud of self-pity when something bad happens look at it from a different perspective. Life is so much more than a rough day or a breakup or a rejection letter from a school. The things we think are a big deal when they happen are really just like a little pond or hill in the big map of life. They're important and add excitement to what would be an otherwise flat, easy life...but they aren't worth obsessing over.

So that's what I've decided I want to do in 2014...look at life from a vertical perspective rather than horizontal. Instead of worry and stress over little things, I want to surrender every situation up to God and just enjoy living life with Him. He's crazy about me (and you) and wants us to have fun in our life! He doesn't want us to feel guilty or hurt or disappointed or anything. But in our time here on earth, all of that is going to happen. So the best thing to do is just hand it over to Him, let Him take care of you because that's what He does best! He takes care of the whole earth, every little person in every city...just look out an airplane window and try to wrap you brain around that. It's mind blowing how powerful and incredible He is. So why not take advantage of the fact that a God that awesome would wanna walk through life with you? I promise you that nothing is better...I just need to remember that myself when I'm worrying about the silliest little things.

Just for fun and because I love making resolutions, I'll share some more of my little ones...
1. Take more risks! Again with the idea that I want to simply treasure and enjoy life more, I think taking more risks will be an important part of that. I can get scared and shy and worry about every possible thing that could go wrong but I don't want to let that hold me back from experiencing some awesome things that this world has to offer!
2. Respect Myself. I get so caught up in pleasing other people sometimes or finding a quick fix to a problem that I lose sight of what is best for me. I don't want to become more selfish by any means..in fact I could definitely shed some selfishness in 2014. But I also don't want to live for other people or for anything other than God. He took precious time and effort to create me and I should respect & love myself enough to do only what pleases Him and if it lines up with what He wants, what pleases me, even if it isn't always what the people around me want me to do.
3. Less technology, more living. I've said this in my posts many times before, but I'll say it again. I love technology and social media and all that as much as anyone in this generation, heck I'm spending New Years Eve typing a blog post! But it has had some very negative effects on me before and in 2014 I want to be able to limit how attached I am to all my gadgets. Too much social networking has caused me to compare, to obsess, to envy, and simply get distracted or detached from the beautiful things around me. I have a love/hate relationship with it but in 2014 I would like to limit it enough so that it's only a love relationship and I don't let it negatively affect me!
4. Embrace my dorkiness. Yes, that's really one of my resolutions...a friend helped me think of it after a dorky conversation we had about how much we love vocabulary and words and stuff. :) But seriously, it's so easy for a shy girl like me to get embarrassed about things and to hide parts of my personality...especially in high school where there is so much pressure to be cool. Not that I'd get bullied for expressing my love for English or something but I still do feel the need to suppress my quirkier personality traits. But where's the fun in that? In 2014 as I finish high school and enter college, I want to show my true self to everyone I meet, because the people that want to be around me when I'm actually being me are the people who make life the best anyway!

Well I hope you all had a fabulous NYE and more importantly, an incredible 2014! Thank you for reading and again, thanks for you support. This blog has been one of my favorite parts of 2013!

Happy New Years!

"No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us." Philippians 3:13, 14

"In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps." Proverbs 16:9

“But forget all that— it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland." Isaiah 43:18, 19

Beautiful view from the airplane. I love how you can see the mountains, beach, and city all in one shot. 

 

My sister and me in Cali

 

My cute parents ringing in the New Year!

the gift we cannot live without

Have you ever wanted something so badly for Christmas? You just felt like you could not live without it and that if you did not unwrap this certain thing on Christmas morning, you'd feel like something was missing. A few years ago all I wanted was a puppy. Every time my parents asked what I wanted I said "a puppy pug." When they told me I couldn't have that, I said I didn't want anything else for Christmas. On Christmas morning I walked downstairs to find a stuffed animal pug sitting on the couch. I was full of disappointment, almost to the point of tears. It's ridiculous to think about now because I had so many other great gifts, and even more importantly, my amazing family. It's even more ridiculous because they ended up surprising me with a precious, REAL pug later that morning. Once I got to hold my very first puppy, I felt like Christmas was complete and was truly content. My sister did the same thing with hermit crabs. Every year from when she was like 2 to 6 she asked for them and when she didn't get them, she cried. She finally gave up on that dream and realized there was more to Christmas than hermit crabs.

That's what we all need to realize....there's more to Christmas, more to life actually, than just gifts and worldly things. I've had to learn this truth the hard way, but there wasn't a more perfect time to learn it than right before Christmas- the day that so many believe is all about themselves but those who grasp the true meaning of it realize that we are meant to celebrate one gift and one gift only. I've recently been caught up in a certain sin that I just couldn't let go of. I wasn't happy living in it, but I was comfortable and didn't want to have to deal with it, especially during all the craziness of Christmas. Once I was forced to deal with it, not on my own terms, I realized that I was hurting a lot of people, including myself. It wasn't fun dealing with it, in fact it was miserable...but I am so glad I did because it made me realize so much more about Jesus. When I was feeling alone and terrible for hurting people I love, God reminded me that He is ALL I need. It'll be a journey forgiving myself and getting other people to forgive me, but I have to trust that God will take care of me through it. Although celebrating Christmas with my family will be amazing, I realized that all the presents I'm about to receive wouldn't make the situation any better.

There is only one thing I truly need...the gift that Jesus gave me and all of us when He came to this earth and died a terrible death for us: freedom. The gift of freedom that comes from knowing Jesus Christ includes:

• freedom from our sins and past mistakes, whether they happened five minutes ago or five years ago
• freedom from worrying about the people we love because we can trust that God will take care of them better than we ever could
• freedom from trying to make our own plans and figure things out ourselves
• freedom from the titles this world gives us
• freedom from guilt and self-pity
• freedom from everything bad about this earth because our citizenship is in Heaven

This Christmas, I've realized that the freedom that Jesus gave us when He came into this world and gave up his life is only gift I will ever need, the gift I could never live without. This freedom is what will make Christmas, and my whole life, feel complete. In the midst of my brokenness, Jesus is the only thing that can bring me peace and I am so humbled that He would give up everything just so I could be free from my own sin and my own mistakes. My prayer is that you experience the freedom that Christ has given us and that you realize it is ALL you need. 

Merry Christmas everybody, thank you for reading!

"So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free." John 8:36

"So Christ has truly set us free. Now make sure that you stay free, and don’t get tied up again in slavery to the law." Galatians 5:1

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." John 3:16, 17

"I love God’s law with all my heart. But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin." Romans 7:22-25

My beloved pug, Janet

Wonderfully Made.

Hello all! I hope everybody had a wonderful, restful, joyful Thanksgiving break. I am so thankful for each of you who takes the time to read my blog and for all of the encouragement you give me via twitter, facebook, or through comments on my blog! I am also thankful that the Lord knew what He was doing when He prompted me to start a blog because each post I write at least one person tells me it impacted them in some way and that is all I wanted when I started it...for God to speak through me to at least just one person :) Anyway, sorry you have not heard from me in a while but I'm back and cannot wait to share with you!

Eh, well that last sentence was a little bit of a lie. I am not all that excited to write this post because it requires me to be extra vulnerable. But I feel the need to write it because I don't want anybody else believing the same lies that have been dragging me down lately.

Insecurity in the way we look is something that has been around for ages, or at least since mirrors were invented. But I'm pretty darn sure it has never been as bad as it is in this day and age. Now I love instagram and twitter and Pinterest as much as the next girl but I believe they are very much to blame for this issue. That's because these sites allow us to compare every little thing about our real life self to other people's edited, beautified, filtered selves. I'm guilty of this on both sides, which makes me so frustrated that I let it consume so much of me. If there is an instagram effect that will make my skin look better, you bet I'm going to use it. But then I'll look at somebody else's post and feel so defeated that my skin doesn't look like theirs. Don't get me wrong, I don't think there is anything wrong with editing your pictures but it's the comparing that I cannot stand.

Why can't we just accept that God made us exactly how He wanted to and that we are his most treasured creation? It'd be easy for me to say that I have accepted this truth and wake up just absolutely loving myself every morning but this is so far from the truth. To be completely honest it is very difficult for me to believe that I am "wonderfully and fearfully made" (Psalm 139:14) when I wake up with a giant zit on my face or I'm having a bad hair day. But I don't think that God expects us to feel beautiful all the time, or at least not physically beautiful.

My obsession over image and physical appearance used to be one of the major things I was a slave to before I gave my heart to Jesus. And sometimes when I drift away from God I let them consume me all over again. For the past few weeks, my walk with God has been hindered because of my obsession over meeting the world's standards of beauty. Thoughts such as "I'd be so much prettier if my nose was shaped differently" or "If only I had better skin I wouldn't have to wear so much makeup and people would consider me naturally beautiful" or "Once my hair is a certain length I'll be satisfied with my appearance" just fill my brain all the time. I am laughing at myself as I'm typing these things and I'm sure you're laughing as you read them (especially if you are a boy) because it really is so silly that these types of thoughts have been consuming me, but I told you I was going to be completely transparent so there it is.

As I said I don't think God expects us to feel just absolutely beautiful all the time. He desperately wants us to see ourselves the way He does but He knows that it won't always be that way, and that's okay. I think what is truly important on days that we don't love the way we look is to remember what actually matters. We are more than just a body or a face covered in clothes and makeup, we have souls and minds and hearts. We have potential and ambition, we each have talents and skills and unique features that make us who we are. We each have a specific role in God's greater plan, a specified position just for us if we are willing to take it. Most importantly, we have a mighty, powerful, creative, wise God who is living within us and walking through every moment with us.

This world makes us believe that life is meant to be all about us and that the way we look, the way we act, the possessions we have, and the things we have accomplished will determine the way we end up. But as Christians, we must remember that we already know the way things will end. We are already citizens of Heaven and when it's all said and done, that is where we will spend all of eternity. Life on earth is not about us, it is about the God we are following. It's our mission to use the tools and gifts HE has given us to make our mark on the world. To let HIS words and HIS truth speak through us. To follow the creative and beautiful path HE laid out for us. To let HIS beauty shine through us.

Knowing this, I can go through life not having to worry about the way I look. My God did create me exactly how He wanted me to be and to Him, I am more beautiful than sunsets and mountains and gardens. I don't always believe this, but it is not the point of life. God did not create me to just be pretty, He created me to be a powerful woman of God, which is essentially the most beautiful thing a girl can be. When I used to hear sermons on beauty, I used to think I was expected to wake up and feel so great about my appearance every single day and I would get so discouraged when I couldn't do it. But what really matters is that I focus on what I'm truly here for. When I remember the God who created me and the plans He has made for me, one little zit or some split ends seem like the dumbest thing to care about.

My hope is that the next time you are feeling down about your appearance,
1. you remember that your extravagantly creative God, who made the bluest oceans and peacocks (my favorite animal) and forests of evergreens and snow-tipped mountains and cute little lady bugs and pretty white cats with one blue eye and one brown eye and whatever else you find beautiful in nature, considers you His most treasured creation. You are wonderfully made and you are His masterpiece.
2. you don't let it consume you. There is so much more to life than the way you look. Some days this is hard to believe, but if you take a step back and look at the bigger picture, it is a ridiculous thing to care about. Our mission is to bring glory to God and to tell as many people we can about HIS beauty and who HE is. That is truly all that matters.

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:13, 14

"But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

"You are altogether beautiful, my darling; there is no flaw in you." Song of Solomon 4:7

These things make up true beauty.

Five of the most beautiful girls I know, inside and out.

My family makes me feel oh so beautiful

One more bit of truth.

Unchanging

Hello everyone! I am so excited to finally have time to sit and write (or type a should say) about all the things God has been teaching me and showing me lately! Instead of my usual long intro, I'm just going to jump right into things! :)

Something I have learned recently is that as believers, we often go through so-called "seasons" in our relationship with God. There will be seasons where we feel very clear about where the Lord is calling us and we are passionate about submitting ourselves to His plan. There will be seasons where we experience immense heartache or suffering and God is the only thing that we have to cling to. There will be seasons where God is just rocking our world with one blessing after another and everything seems to fall into place. Unfortunately, there will also be seasons where we try to do life on our own or cannot seem to turn away from a certain repetitive sin. There will be seasons where we have grown to be content in our relationship and can't seem to find the passion to reach for more. Sometimes these seasons will only last a few days or weeks and sometimes for a year or longer.

The point is that we, as humans whose attitudes and moods are constantly affected by the craziness of this world, waver in our relationships with Christ. But He never ever ever changes. From the time our God created the universe and breathed life into man, to when He sent His only Son to carry the burden of our sin, to this very second, He has remained the same. His power has not strengthened nor weakened over time, His love for us has not increased nor decreased, His creativity and His beauty has not faded. He is the God who was and is and is to come. He knew the plan for this world and for every single person in it before it all came to be. And this is why He is the strongest foundation to build our lives on.

Reading stories like Jonah and the whale, or Noah's Ark, or the parting of the Red Sea, it was always hard for me to comprehend that the same God who worked all of those miracles is the same God who loves me today. Those stories seemed ridiculous to me and I never thought that miracles like that could still happen today. Obviously God is not going to flood the whole earth or part a sea any time soon, but He is working miracles all around us that make it so difficult for us to deny His power. Let me just describe to you a few of the miracles I have gotten to witness recently...

A few weekends ago my church did a three-weekend long series called "Unashamed." In this series, people who had committed their lives to Christ but had not been baptized yet were challenged to get baptized in order to show the world that they are unashamed that their heart belongs to Jesus. The cool thing was that people could get spontaneously baptized along with the people who had already signed up in advance to get baptized. There ended up being 842 people baptized at the three campuses of my church over just two weekends! It was truly a miracle that God was able to speak through our pastor to that many people, and that all of those lives were forever changed in just two weekends. Getting to play the honorary role of a "towel girl," I had the privilege of getting to see people's immediate joy when they came out of the water and I got to personally congratulate all those who took this next step with Christ. The most special part of the experience for me, however, was watching my little brother and parents get spontaneously baptized. They were there to support my sister and I when we got baptized so it was amazing to get to be on the other end and support them. I consider a miracle in itself how much God has moved in my family, individually and as a whole. 

"This messenger was John the Baptist. He was in the wilderness and preached that people should be baptized to show that they had repented of their sins and turned to God to be forgiven. All of Judea, including all the people of Jerusalem, went out to see and hear John. And when they confessed their sins, he baptized them in the Jordan River." Mark 1:4-5 

In the same way that God spoke through John the Baptist to the people of Judea and Jerusalem, convincing them to repent of their sins and get baptized on the spot, God worked the same type of miracle at my church. It's so beautiful that the stuff we read about in the bible is happening today and God is using people like you and me, even if it's just as a towel girl, to play a part in His miracles.

This past Wednesday FCA's annual "Fields of Faith" was held at Texas Tech's Jones AT&T Stadium. Thousands of middle school and high school students from all different churches and schools in Lubbock and the surrounding areas came to worship and to hear students, athletes, and pastors give their testimonies. When the last speaker was finished he called for every student who wanted to commit or recommit his/her  life to Christ to come down on the field. There have been at least a thousand kids receive the gift of salvation that night but the even cooler part was the way the other kids in the stands cheered and even shed tears for their new brothers and sisters in Christ. Thousands being saved in one night is no doubt a miracle, but it doesn't stop there. The fact that a bunch of students from competing schools, belonging to different groups of friends, all involved in different activities could come together and lift praises up to Our Father in a division 1 football stadium is also a beautiful miracle and proof of God's glory.

Whatever season you are going through in your spiritual life, I hope you are encouraged by the fact that God never changes. He never gives up on you and never changes His glorious plans for you, no matter how much you drift from Him. He makes all things work together for your good! No matter how messy your life is, He wants you to play a part in the miracles He is making happen today!

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Hebrews 13:8

Pictures of each of my family members being baptized

My sweet family

My friend, Georgia Beth, also got baptized! So happy for her :)

All the kids who were saved at Fields of Faith

My friends and I at Fields of Faith

Choose Truth!

Hello all! Over the past few weeks, I've been praying for guidance on what to post about next and was, honestly, just kind of hoping for God to reveal to me something my readers needed to hear. Instead, He gave me a huge reality check and shook my brain. I felt convicted and challenged and definitely humbled so now I would like to share about it with y'all!

This is my best attempt to paraphrase what The Lord was trying to tell me: "Mary Catherine, you cannot hold onto worldly thoughts and desires any longer. This world tells you the complete opposite of what I tell you. Worldly thinking and heavenly thinking cannot coexist."

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:8-9

Ever since my senior year started, I've been trying so hard to live a life based on worldly desires and to satisfy opinions of worldly people while at the same time trying to seek out what God wants of me and to please Him. Let me tell you...it's exhausting. Absolutely exhausting. Don't try it. What I've discovered through this is that this broken, fallen world is the complete opposite of the Kingdom of God. It sounds silly saying that I didn't realize that until now; it's such an obvious fact told to us over and over again. But it's not so much that I didn't know it to be true, it's that I didn't live in that truth.

I'd like to take this post to compare some of the lies that the world tells us to the truth that God has shown us over and over since the beginning of time.

What the world tells us:

• Titles, labels, status, and stereotypes matter. Try to be someone who impresses people and who people feel cool to be around.

• If you cannot please the people around you, you are doing something wrong.

• You must do everything you can to try and find someone who will love you and make feel important. Life will be better with a significant other to lean on. If you cannot find one, lower your standards.

• Beauty is a clear face. Beauty is a cute, skinny body. Beauty is pretty long hair. Beauty is a cute nose, good smile, tan skin....(I could go on forever). Beauty is important, people must not see your flaws.

• Don't ask for help. Don't be vulnerable. You cannot trust people and you cannot look weak. You must rely on yourself to keep it all together.

• You have your whole life to figure things out. If you're young, make mistakes and don't worry if you feel like you're doing the wrong thing...you have so much time to do the right thing when you're older.

• Do whatever you can to make yourself happy. Your happiness is what matters most and if that means the expense of others' happiness, it's worth it.

• Gossiping is normal. It's okay to talk about people who you believe aren't as good as you or seem to make mistakes more than you.

What God tells us:

• You are His child. That is the only title that matters. All other titles and statuses that seem to be important now will fade and God's children will be exalted.

"But many who are the greatest now will be least important then, and those who seem least important now will be the greatest then." Matthew 19:30

• He loves everything about you and is completely pleased with who you are, after all He made you. Instead of exhausting yourself trying to please people whose attitudes and opinions are constantly changing, spend time doing what is pleasing to God whose plans for you are solid and unchanging. 

"Obviously, I’m not trying to win the approval of people, but of God. If pleasing people were my goal, I would not be Christ’s servant." Galatians 1:10

• An intimate relationship with your Creator is the most precious, fulfilling thing. One day He will provide someone who will love you in the best way a human could, but no human love will bring the satisfaction God can. Singleness is a gift. Spend time falling in love with Him. 

"Your unfailing love is better to me than life itself; how I praise you! I will honor you as long as I live, lifting up my hands to you in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy." Psalm 63:3-5

• Beauty is exactly how God made you. A beautiful person is one whose heart belongs to God. That is the beauty that lasts and that is the beauty that matters.

"You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you." Song of Solomon 4:7

"But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious." 1 Peter 3:4

• We must surround ourselves with people we can lean on and we must reveal to them our struggles and our flaws. We are not designed to do life alone and we are not designed to be invincible. Humans are weak and our lives are messy; the only way to survive is to let God speak to us and comfort us not only through our relationship with Him but through our relationship with others.

"As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend." Proverbs 27:17

• We are not promised another day. We cannot be selfish and put God on the back-burner for when we are older so we can have "fun" and make mistakes now. We must surrender each and every day to Him, not just the future.

"How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone. What you ought to say is, 'If the Lord wants us to, we will live and do this or that.'” James 4:14, 15

• Loving on others and serving them will bring you more joy than you could imagine. God's two greatest commandments are to love Him and love others...loving yourself isn't part of the equation.

"We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters." 1 John 3:16

• We tend to gossip when we are insecure about ourselves. But slandering our brothers and sister breaks God's heart, because we are insulting His precious creations. Everyone is equal in His eyes and it is not our job to judge those around us. Focus on your own shortcomings and love others in spite of theirs.

"Does anyone want to live a life that is long and prosperous? Then keep your tongue from speaking evil and your lips from telling lies!" Psalm 12, 13

These are just a few examples of the lies the world tries to tell us. I could give you more, but my guess is that you have probably picked up on the fact that most everything the world tells us is completely the opposite of what The Lord tells us. The difference is that the word of God is truth and this truth is the way to a fulfilling life. I knew a lot of these things before my reality check, but selfishly, I caved into the world believing that it could bring me more joy than living righteously could. Now I have made the choice to live in the Truth. I'm going to stumble and I'm going to stray, but I have faith that my God will pull me right back like He always has. I pray that you will desire to live in the Truth and will find tremendous joy in doing so. Thanks for reading. God bless you all :)

"And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul?" Matthew 16:26

Don't forget

Hello blog readers! It's been quite a while since I've posted and I'm sorry for that but I'm hoping to start posting more frequently again! When I first started this blog I posted once or twice a week and I'd love for it to be that way again. My desire to be more consistent in my posting is a perfect comparison to what this post is about...fading passion, becoming lukewarm, and growing content.

I'm going to be honest, I can be so forgetful in my walk with Christ. I forget the promises He's made me. I forget the prayers He's answered. I forget the commands He's given me and the way He has blessed me when I obeyed. I forget the miracles He's performed that I've gotten to witness or hear about. I forget that He never holds grudges and always always looks on me with love. And most of all, I forget that chasing after Him and letting Him rule my life is the most fulfilling thing I could ever choose to do.

For the past week or so I've felt really discouraged in my walk. I've found it hard to sit down and have quiet time and really be genuine about it. I think the main reason for that is my inability to shake away this lie that the devil keeps putting in my head. I've constantly thought to myself, "You will never again be as passionate about your savior as when you were when you first gave yourself to Him." While it is true that every new follower is so excited and on fire at first, it's completely false that it can't stay that way. Sure there will be times when we grow lukewarm and don't fully reach out to God, but in general if we're pursuing Him we are meant to fall more and more in love with Him as we go through life with Him.

I've discovered that the reason I've felt this way is because I seem to let all of the times He's revealed Himself to me and covered me in love slip my memory way too often. He's always in love with me and never stops wanting me, but sometimes I don't want to accept that love simply because I forget how great it is and how much it is unlike earthly love. When I realized how much I'd forgotten and how that has affected the way I've been living my life, I decided to do something about it. I wanted to be just as passionate as I was when I first discovered the truth about Jesus and I wanted that passion to grow stronger than ever before.

I have found that yhe best ways to be reminded of how powerful and wonderful our God is are as follows:

• Simply ask Him in prayer to help you to accept His love and to increase your capacity to obey Him. The first time I heard the idea that we should ask God to help us love Him I thought it was so silly but really it isn't. More than anyone, He understands how hard it is for us on earth to grasp the idea of a love so great but He wants so badly to help us grasp it.
• Read His word. Read stories of the miracles Jesus performed while He walked the earth. Read in Genesis about the beginning of creation. Maybe you've read about these things countless times, but I've found that depending on where you are in your walk, scripture can mean something totally different to you and speak to you in new ways no matter how much you've read it.
• If you already write your prayers in a journal, go back and read old ones. Be reminded of the prayers He's answered and the promises He's kept. Or be reminded of certain times when you were especially passionate about Him. If you don't keep a journal, start one so you can keep track of your prayers and write down scripture that touches you or certain ways you saw God move. Do whatever you want with it really, all I know is that it is definitely worth it.
• Ask others about their walk! Have them share with you the ways they've seen God move and be encouraged by how much He loves each of His sons and daughters!
• Get an accountability partner or mentor to keep you on track and always have people who are praying for your walk!

I hope all of you feel God's immense love for you as you go throughout your week! Thanks for reading.

Silence

...can be scary. Terrifying actually. When nothing else is calling for our attention, we are forced to face ourselves. When the TV is turned off, the computer shut down, and the social networks put aside we have nothing to distract us from our own thoughts. And for that reason we often stay up late into the night watching or reading or scrolling or posting and check our phone first thing when we wake up. This is especially true when something heart-breaking or tragic is going on in our lives, because we will do anything to keep that thing from occupying our mind. While sometimes it's nice to have things that keep us from thinking too much, putting all of the distractions aside and facing your problems, sins, and emotions is crucial to a healthy heart and life.

First off I want to clarify something. Nothing I post is to brag or to say "I have mastered this lesson so now you should too." Usually everything I post is something I constantly struggle with and I use this blog to be held accountable and to let others know that they aren't alone in their struggles.

This is something I've felt convicted of for a long time but didn't want to come to terms with until just recently. I get so wrapped up in making sure I'm constantly doing something in order to keep my mind off of my problems or my weaknesses. 

Social networks are probably the biggest factor in this problem. With Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and now Vine in the picture, I could scroll and scroll for hours. This scrolling often leads to comparison. Thoughts such as "why can't I go on vacations like that?" and "why does their night look so much more fun than mine?" and "how does their hair always look flawless?" begin to consume my mind and all of the sudden I'm spending so much time looking at things that make me feel low about myself instead of soaking up God's word and hearing His thoughts about me.

God never wants us to think someone else is better than us or more loved than us. He gets oh so jealous when we choose to spend our time comparing our lives to others and believing the lies the world and the enemy are trying to tell us. He doesn't want that for us. He longs for us to sit down and devote time to Him. He wants us to allow His thoughts on us to define our lives. He wants to shower us in blessings and to see us be who He created us to be. It's silly to sit and spend time comparing our lives to what we see on social networks anyway. People only post the highlights of their lives but we compare every part of our lives to what we see. Spending time doing this will only result in disappointment and self-pity. But spending time talking to God and reading about His goodness will renew our hope and fill us with joy. The more time we spend hangin out with Our Father, the closer we'll get to Him, just like a relationship with an earthly father (but better, of course). The more time we spend in intimate conversation with our bridegroom, the more we will fall in love with Him, just like a relationship with an earthly groom (but also much better).

A lack of quiet time hinders us from acheiving our full spiritual potential and from developing an intimate, whole-hearted relationship with Our King. My prayer is that this week you will put down the technology, shut off the TV, and cut out some time to spend with Jesus. I promise you will not regret it!

After sending the people away, he went up a hill by himself to pray. When evening came, Jesus was there alone. Matthew 14:23

At that time Jesus went up a hill to pray and spent the whole night there praying to God. Luke 6:12

(even Jesus knew he needed his quiet time)

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. Matthew 5:6

Picture I took while having my quiet time outside the other day. Just a tiny glimpse of God's beauty :)